Monday, February 4, 2008

Mayoral Moron

I am not an overly politically vocal individual. Yes, I have strong political leanings and I have been known to be an armchair political commentary, generally about Stephen Harper and his creepiness and general evilness. While not being a card carrying member of the NDP, I tend to lean left in my beliefs and vote to reflect that. In general my political interest stops at the federal and provincial level. Municipal politics doesn't interest me that much.

That however has been changed thanks to Vancouver's mayor and resident moron, Sam Sullivan. I have now made it my goal to ensure that he does NOT get re-elected to run the fair city I work in. I live in Burnaby. The Burnaby Mayor Derek Corrigan has a lovely mustache and is fairly innocuous. Go Derek Go!

Oh Sam....Sam Sam Sam.

I have in the past waxed poetically on Mayor Sullivan and Project Civil City. A momentary lapse in judgment due to expectorant. It will not happen again.

Before I continue to rant...let us recap our young mayor's bio:

1. Gave money to someone to buy drugs and smoke them in his van
2. Project Civil City-lord knows what he was thinking. Of COURSE being polite should be top priority.
3. Sullivan's Strike
4. $400,000.00 per year for a security guard for a CLOCK

And his most recently publicized brilliant idea...

No sirens on emergency vehicles at night.

WHAT?

This REALLY burns my cookies.

Mayor Sullivan appealed to Premier Gordon Campbell last year asking him to change the law regarding emergency vehicles and siren usage. Apparently the Mayor's sleep was being disrupted in his chic Yaletown condo. Effective January 31, 2008, emergency vehicle drivers around BC are encouraged to use their discretion when driving later at night.

Edited to note: City of Vancouver emergency vehicle drivers have chosen NOT to turn off their sirens...beautifully ironic...isn't it?

Um...dude...get a freaking grip. SO WHAT if you lose a few minutes of sleep because a fire truck, ambulance or police car are heading to or from an emergency. Just take a nap at work! No one will notice the difference

As it stands right now, Vancouver residents are HORRIBLE when it comes to getting out of the way of emergency vehicles. I am frequently stunned at the average driver's inability to get out of the way of flashing lights and sirens. And pedestrians are even worse!

Dear God in heaven Sammy...get your head OUT of your freaking butt and grab a clue! There are better things for you to be spending your time on than politeness and loud sirens! Why don't you check out the homeless in the Downtown Eastside Sammy? Or better yet...just trade spaces with them. Allow a few to shack up in your condo while you sleep under that cardboard box. Then maybe the sirens won't wake you up as much...

Thursday, January 31, 2008

When the cat's away

I work in an office with a bunch of VERY hard working creative people. We have all had extremely stressful weeks, what with crazy clients, unrealistic deadlines and impossible dreams.

Today...for whatever reason...we were a bit slow. And our two biggest practical jokers were out of the office...

Here is what happened...Needless to say...I am never going on vacation...

Talk to the hand

This morning as I was crossing Burrard on my way to the office, the woman in front of me held up her hand to all cars. She didn't just casually lift her hand to say "Hey! Thanks for stopping" or even "Hey! Nice wheels!". No, she FLUNG her hand towards the cars waiting patiently for us as we crossed the road as if to say "LOOK AT MY HAND! IT IS POWERFUL AND MIGHTY, YOU ASSHOLE DRIVER!!!"

I witness this kind of behaviour frequently when navigating my car through Vancouver traffic...and I am going to be honest with you...it simply does NOT illicit the response that I think this lady is thinking it does.

It takes EVERY ounce of my restraint to NOT step on the gas and run over pedestrians that "give me the hand". Do they really think the only reason I'm not running them over is because of their hand? That I say to myself "OH! Its a hand! I guess I won't run the red light and mow down this pedestrian because of THE HAND!"?

Silly walkers. What I, and I am guessing every other driver being given "the hand" is thinking is "I really want to run you over. Desperately. Do you REALLY think I'm that dumb? Do you REALLY think you are that much better than me because you are a pedestrian? You are an idiot. I want to make you road pizza. Grrrrrrrrr."

Perhaps I have a bit of pent up rage I need to deal with...

Monday, January 21, 2008

Thumbs Up: Once

I

LOVED

THIS

MOVIE!

There...got that out of the way.

The hubby and I watched Once about a month ago. We had been wanting to see it for sometime, but hadn't really gotten around to it.

That, my friends, was a mistake.

This is truly a lovely lovely movie.

Nothing explodes.

No one dies.

There is no gratuitous nudity, violence or really...anything.

It is a movie that I defy anyone...ANYONE to watch and not smile about when the movie is done.

The story is simple...

Guy meets Girl (that's actually how they're billed in the credits). Guy and Girl sing. So they sing together, find out they kind of like each other...but its complicated. So they continue to sing. Alot. But its lovely music. So its a musical, but not in that "I am so happy I am going to burst into song and do a nifty dance move" kind of musical. Its a movie about music. And good music at that.

And it rocked.

The movie is set in Dublin, so the scenery is marvy, the accents are brilliant and the scarves are snuggly. The music will engage your heart.

"Guy" is played by Glen Hansard the lead singer, guitarist and a founding member of Irish rock group The Frames. His only other acting experience comes from another wee Irish movie, The Commitments. "Girl" is played by Marketa Irglova. All the music in the film was written by the two of them. Hansard and Irglova previously released an album together called "The Swell Season."



To quote Stephen Spielberg (yup...thats right...Stephen Spielberg)
"A little movie called Once gave me enough inspiration to last the rest of the year."

And it will...really...it will...

Monday, January 14, 2008

You can take the girl off the island...

I grew up on Vancouver Island in the Cowichan Valley. It was a lovely and slightly idyllic existence on a farm with goats, cats and a really smelly dog named Flashy.

There are a few ways to recognize a girl that grew up SO CLOSE to Duncan (but not Duncan itself. this is key. Its like Surrey and White Rock. Trust me on this) They include:
  1. Her love of heavy metal. Specifically Metallica, AC/DC, The Scorpions and Megadeth
  2. Her ability to drink anyone under the table at any time
  3. Her ability to tell the difference between a Jersey and a Holstein (they are cows by the way)
  4. Her big hair
  5. Her overwhelming glee at the resurgence of shows like...
AMERICAN GLADIATORS!!!

Oh the cheese. Oh the yelling. Oh the ludicrous outfits and even more ludicrous names.



AND its hosted by Laila Ali and Hulk Hogan!

OH THE JOY!

All this joy go me to thinking about the old classic American Gladiators. Whatever happened to them? Malibu, Lace and Nitro...where are they now???

Well thanks to the CRACKERJACK research of my fantastic coworker I found THIS!

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Happy anniversary to me


A year ago (almost) I started this blog with the intention of writing more, expressing myself, doing something creative and bringing light to the world.

pause for the chorous of angels.

As of late, I have been EXTREMELY lax in my blogging. I could come up with a variety of exciting excuses...but alas, it just comes down to being VERY VERY LAZY!

yes, its sad.

But NO MORE!

I will be better now that the year has started and I am newly motivated!

I will blog about the adventures I have on BC Transit like this morning when I was hit on by a REALLY cute 21 year old med student on the bus on the way to work. Did I mention he was REALLY cute? However, I became SO distracted by the fact that I "still have it" (YAY ME) that I missed my stop and had to walk an extra 10 blocks to work in the rain.

pause as my husband falls over in hysterical laughter at what a dork his wife is.

I will blog about my love for my job. Seriously. I LOVE MY JOB!

I will blog about new exciting shows like the RETURN OF AMERICAN GLADIATORS which has me embarrassingly excited.

I will NOT blog about the fact that I am doing a cleanse again. And that I am REALLY craving cheese and I am only on day three.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I WILL blog about the fact that I am in a show! YAY ME! I am doing the Vagina Monologues at the Red Robinson Show Theatre in Coquitlam on March 1! SNAP!

I will blog about the rehearsal process of the aforementioned show including my experience with the "make your own vagina" craft project that I will be participating in this coming Sunday.

no, I did not make that up.

And SO MUCH MORE!

The spirit has moved me...and has me moving FAST baby!